To the Moon and Back

Guess How Much I Love You was the very first book I knew I wanted to get for my girls. It's so sweet and I've always loved it. I bought both of them their very own and Josh and I wrote them each a love note inside.
The girls at this point were at separate hospitals, so we were always at one or the other. We spent 90% of our time with Adison because she was so much sicker than Avery. One day I'll tell all about Adison and what exactly happened, but not today. I don't know if or when I'll be emotionally ready to type it all.
Anyway...Even though the majority of our time was spent with Adison we managed to visit with Avery every day. Avery thankfully had wonderful nurses so that made it somewhat easier to be away. Our hearts were always with both of them even if our bodies weren't. 
They (they being Josh, my Mom and Sister) had to physically make me leave to eat otherwise I would have never left.  July 8th to be exact we ran to a bookstore so I could get them this book. I knew in my heart Adison's time was short so I never wanted to leave but for whatever reason it was important to me to get this book for my girls.
After we got the books we went to visit Avery. Josh and I wrote something special in it and I read it to her. At the end of the story Big Nutbrown hare says to Little Nutbrown Hare "I love you right up to the moon and back" and I said to Avery "Mommy loves you right up to the moon and back" With tears streaming down my face I left Avery to go be with Adison. Even though Adison was the sickest Avery was a sick baby too. I was so worried about both my babies.
When we got to Adison all I wanted to do was read her, her book. Well that didn't happen until after long tough talks with Dr's all night. Josh and I managed to write something special to her in between all the talks. Finally at 4am I was able to read to Adison. It was just she and I. Josh had went to nap for a few hours in the room they gave us. It took me an hour and a half to read it to her, I just couldn't stop crying. I couldn't help but think this is the very first and very last time I'll ever read to her. It broke my heart and still does. When I had made it through I said the same to her as I said to Avery "Mommy loves you right up to the moon and back". She went to be with Jesus that night at 6:03 pm, so it was in fact the very first and the very last time I read to her.
I still tell Avery every single night "Mommy loves you right up to the moon and back"

I say all that to explain this and how special the meaning is...
It's a necklace I had made that has a moon and it says I love you to the moon and back. There's two little charms that has each of their names on it and a little heart charm as well as their birthstone. I just love it! It's how I feel written on silver, worn around my neck close to my heart :)